So Monday was National Boss’s Day and I didn’t even know it until I saw a few acknowledgments on Facebook. I cannot believe I am my own boss! I’ve only been telling whoever would listen at all my old jobs that I wouldn’t be working for someone else long. I just didn’t know at the time exactly how much those words I spoke would resonate in my life, nor did I know how to make it happen. I look back at all the jobs I’ve worked, none of which really correlate with any other, and I still can’t believe I’ve made it this far. However, at the same time, something deep within me always knew that I would not be working to help anyone else live out there dreams. Call it the law of attraction if you will!
27 is a number, specifically an age, that has always scared me for some odd reason. It could be the series of unlucky events tied to the number – such as all the celebrities who die questionably at that age – but so far it has been one heck of a ride for me; and I’m only five months in. I saw this quote on Facebook yesterday and felt an immediate sense of relief wash over me. Apparently I am not the only woman who feels like everything is simultaneously falling apart and coming together at this current point in my life. My tolerance for people is at an all time low, but at the same time things that used to bother me don’t affect me as much anymore. Once you recognize which friends are really beneficial to your life and you to theirs, you begin to focus on building those relationships more efficiently instead of wasting time trying to make certain people the way you wish they could or have potential to be. If I haven’t learned anything else, I’m beyond hip to the understanding that you can’t change people. Recently I’ve found myself praying for others more than anything.
2016 has been a mix of extreme highs and lows with little to no medium for me thus far. Continue reading The Best Is Yet to Come
You know you that b*tch when you cause all this conversation; always stay gracious, best revenge is your paper
I really didn’t want to do this because quite frankly, I’m sick of hearing about Beyoncé right now whether good or bad. Everyone knows I’m a Beyoncé fan, but I didn’t even get tickets to her concert this go around after being present for her last three shows. The only reason I’m even doing this is due to the high accolades Kendrick Lamar is receiving for his genius performance on the Grammys last night. If you know me, you also know I’m a huge KDot fan and he’s my brother in my head; however, I happen to find issues with the fact that many individuals have been negatively comparing Beyoncé’s Super Bowl performance and “Formation” video while praising Kendrick’s Grammy performance last night. I beg to differ and am open minded enough to see the same message delivered in both with disparate artistry. In my views Beyoncé opted for a more unconventional route while Kendrick went with relatable visuals and deep lyricism as only he can do; but I still got similar messages from both.
No matter how happy I am, I’ve realized that happiness is a fleeting feeling that only comes with the good times in life; but it never stays with me forever. Everything could be going right in my life, making me 100% happy, but no matter what I always feel like something is missing. Well they say it’s best to find joy instead of seeking happiness and it’s taken me quite some time to recognize that as the truth. See I tend to stand in denial at times when it comes to happiness because I never want to seem ungrateful for the great things that go on in my life. But who wants their happiness to be contingent upon their current position in life, where they stand in situations, or people in the world who have yet to find their own way? That’s exactly what happiness is.
I can be such a plain Jane sometimes. I know when I post on social media there’s usually nothing plain about my attire. There’s absolutely nothing plain about my personality; I’m sarcastically funny, quirky yet entertaining, and very much opinionated. But often times I feel like I’m just a plain Jane… like I’m not enough. I don’t wear makeup too often and when I do it’s usually just eyeliner, mascara, and a lippie. I don’t get my hair done often at all – once every three months if that – and really all I do is wash and air dry it on a daily. I don’t dress up much anymore unless I’m having date night or it’s the rare occasion that I’m going to the club. I often feel like people just pretend to like me because I have that stereotypical “light skin with long hair” look, when in reality I feel like just another girl ALL the time. In a world where millions of picture are uploaded to social media each day and half the women just seemingly look “flawless” in every single post, it’s easy to see why many girls could potentially feel the way I do.
What in the entire hell?? Where did the time go? It’s been a whole 12 years to the date since I lost the most important person I’ve ever lost in life. To think that I was a mere 13 year old girl at the time really weighs heavily on my heart. Not just because I experienced so much pain at such an early age, but because pretty soon I’ll have doubled in age since that tragic day. That completely scares me like no other.
It’s been a few days since I’ve blogged for my 30 day challenge, but I decided to take the weekend off for my birthday. I knew that I would be on the go and not really thinking about blogging, so I just went ahead and took a break. Today’s topic is another really personal one that I don’t really like to talk about, but again you just never know who you might reach with words. It asked me to name a time that I thought about ending my own life… Well here goes.
“Ten years from now bet I still be on top, I thought I told ya’ll that we don’t stop”
Today marks day 2 of my 30 day blogging challenge and the topic is about where I see myself ten years from now. Boy this one is easy! If I don’t think about anything else throughout the day, you can best believe my future is one thing that’s always on my mind. Ten years from now I will be getting ready to turn 35, Trey will be 16, and let me just tell ya’ll… If I’m not well; established by then or remotely close to being where I want to be in life ya’ll might as well kill me now lol. Living out my dreams is not even an option to me!
What do you tell yourself when you get to the point where you’re burnt out and want to give up on life?? I personally remind myself that I have the same hours in a day as Beyonce’. I know ya’ll think I’m foolish over Bey lol and maybe I am! But you have no choice but to respect her grind. A few weeks ago, Kyle Santillian from 102 Jamz, my local radio station in Greensboro, hit me up on twitter regarding an internship opportunity. I had sent him a DM months ago asking if they had anything available, and when I had finally given up hope that’s when he reached out to me!