Tag Archives: friends

27: The Year of Enlightenment 

27 is a number, specifically an age, that has always scared me for some odd reason. It could be the series of unlucky events tied to the number – such as all the celebrities who die questionably at that age – but so far it has been one heck of a ride for me; and I’m only five months in. I saw this quote on Facebook yesterday and felt an immediate sense of relief wash over me. Apparently I am not the only woman who feels like everything is simultaneously falling apart and coming together at this current point in my life. My tolerance for people is at an all time low, but at the same time things that used to bother me don’t affect me as much anymore. Once you recognize which friends are really beneficial to your life and you to theirs, you begin to focus on building those relationships more efficiently instead of wasting time trying to make certain people the way you wish they could or have potential to be. If I haven’t learned anything else, I’m beyond hip to the understanding that you can’t change people. Recently I’ve found myself praying for others more than anything.

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Miami Taught Me!

This time a month ago (I like to perfect my thoughts before writing lol) I was preparing for a weekend girls’ trip to Miami for Memorial Day with my girls Portia, Tia, and Ashley in tow. They all had been to Miami a few times before but this was my first run in the city. I was so excited! The entire weekend I was like a wide eyed child at Disney World for the first time. The main strip on Ocean Drive had been blocked off so no cars could come down at all, so there were people congregated everywhere in the streets and outside the local bars. The weather was absolutely perfect, so much that I’ve found myself missing the humidity and longing for warmer summer nights. I ate good, drank better, danced it up, and relaxed beach and poolside; but the most memorable moments come from random interactions with my friends.

I’m the type of person who runs very low on patience especially when it comes  to other people. I could love you to death but if you ask me a stupid question I’m going to give you a sarcastic response. Don’t judge me, I’m working to be better lol. But guess what? This trip brought to my attention that every single person in the world has something they do out of nature that drives someone else insane. The girls and I have been friends since elementary school so we know each other inside out. I promise you each one of them has a different way of driving me completely insane and I’m 100% positive my snarky attitude and reckless mouth drive them equally insane. 

When it comes to the company we keep we often blur the line that separates friends and associates, causing us to accept behaviors and attitudes from people we shouldn’t. Friends are the people who accept you flaws and all, don’t try to change you, and constantly promote growth in you. You don’t hesitate to do the same for them because the feelings are genuine and require no explanation or second thought. We spend too much time accepting things from people who should have never been able to get that close to us in the first place. Evaluate the friendships you have in place to ensure a common respect is given on both ends. I would rather have one solid friend than six who make me feel some type of way every other week. All “friends” aren’t good friends and sometimes you are what you attract! 

 

The Things I Learned in a Year

Oh what a year it has been for me!  I swear every year on New Year’s Eve, it feels like I’ve let the whole year pass me by and I’ve accomplished nothing. But this year I couldn’t allow my mind to sell myself short like that. I’ve done a lot. I guess it’s just hard for me to commend myself because I’m still not quite where I want to be. However, a major lesson that I’ve learned this year is that nothing works according to my plan, but according to how God sees fit. My destiny was already written, I’m just living to fulfill it!

I moved into a new house over the summer, graduated in May, and started a new job back in September just for starters. I even joined a new church this year. I feel like this church has helped and continues to help me find my way in life and get closer to God. The whole year has been really productive and a major blessing for me overall, but of course every year has its pits too. I cut some people off completely with no warning, caught up with my middle school best friend and picked up like we never left off, and made a new lifelong friend that I’ve been able to travel with. I went from working part time with no health insurance to a full time salary with a health, dental AND vision plan. I got the opportunity to intern for 102 Jamz, learned the basics of radio behind the scenes, and met some amazing people that I’m sure will be contacts for many years to come.

There’s so much that I didn’t do though. I didn’t get perfect grades my last semester in college, and although I’ve walked the stage I still have three courses left to take before I’m actually done because the ones I needed weren’t offered when I needed them. Before I found my current church, I didn’t go to church for probably the first six months of 2014. I didn’t get to go to my internship as many days as I should have because it snowed so much last winter that there were many days I couldn’t even get out of the driveway. I missed plenty of days of work during the winter because I work in Danville and the weather was bananas. I spent so much money on gas to get to and from work on my 30+ minute drive. I sound ridiculous saying typing this after the first paragraph, but these were all things that I stressed about during the times that they happened.

It’s crazy how our minds work and can allow us to complain about frivolous things that won’t even matter at the end of the year. Life really is a constant evolution. If we get worked up about every little thing that doesn’t go as planned, we’d drive ourselves to have a heart attack. I spent so much time this year stressing about things I couldn’t control. Now that I think about it, I have always had everything I need and that in itself is a blessing. When you’re going through and people tell you “it could always be worse”, we really don’t want to hear that shit. But they’re 100% right, it could.

2014 has taught me a lot about people. I am a giver by nature and I expect that in return from the people I give to. I learned real quick that this is not the case in life at all. People will take from you as much as you’re willing to give and then in return be selfish and give you nothing back. I’ve learned to only do for others when I can genuinely accept that I’ll get nothing in return for that action and it still feels good to do. Ever since I decided I wanted to dabble in makeup and fashion, I get SO many requests from people to make them new looks or do their makeup etc which is very time consuming. People don’t want to pay for good quality products or services anymore, but will spend their last dimes on the most ridiculous things! Your money is your money, but don’t expect my time for free when you wouldn’t give me yours if I paid you.

Lastly I’ve realized the value of knowing who you are. I’ve truly spent the last few years finding myself, figuring out who I am and what I want to represent. Even though I don’t have my own business, I consider myself a brand. I carry myself with high regards and like to uphold my image to a certain extent because I respect myself and I demand respect from others. So I won’t do anything too crazy where my self-respect will be questioned. However, I realize that the current generation doesn’t give two damns about an image. Their only concern is getting likes and retweets and I’m over everything about social media, today’s music artists, and everything majority of these celebrities represent now. I literally follow my 5 fave celebs on Instagram now; it gets more and more ratchet by the day! All I can do is hope that everyone gains some sense of awareness of who they are and what they represent before their souls are swallowed whole trying to keep up with this crazy society we live in right now.

Well that’s enough for my ranting for a whole year. Life can only continue to elevate from now into the future! Keep God first, your circle centered, and pray before you post to Facebook! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

Kickin’ It With Keishy

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They say good friends are hard to find, but finding a friend in Keisha was like a bird falling into my lap out of the sky… literally. I love me some Lakeisha! There’s not a day that goes by where we don’t talk and normally it’s an all day thing lol. Anyone who reads our texts would have a hard time keeping up because our topics change so drastically at the blink of an eye. There’s just never a dull moment with her.

I’m always picking Keisha’s head because I learn so much from her and she’s such a creative spirit. I appreciate the fact that she’s an open book with me, always giving me a different perspective on everything we discuss. So I wanted to take it a step further and actually interview her. Her responses show exactly why I love her so much as a person! Dope people come together and create dope sh*t. Here’s the proof:

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Cut That Bishhh Off

One of the hardest things in life for me to do is cut people off. I will drive myself crazy inside by remaining silent about how I really feel towards a person just to maintain peace. I don’t like to hurt my friends or people I love so I try my best to refrain from doing so, but sometimes I end up hurting myself in the end. I’ve been faced with a few situations from various people who I thought were friends, but when I think about how they treat me then the title becomes extremely questionable.

I’m the type of person who is very hands on in all of my relationships. I talk to you just about every day and if not then several times throughout the week. I buy “just because” things for you or your kids if I see something that makes me think of you, I pop up at your house when I have extra free time (which isn’t often but hey it happens sometimes), and I try to make time to see you on a regular basis. I’m just starting to notice that there are a lot of things I’m willing to do as a friend that most people aren’t. That’s totally fine but you just can’t expect me to go above and beyond like I normally would if it’s not being reciprocated to even the smallest degree.

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Fake Ain’t For ME!

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Since I relaunched my blog, I told ya’ll that I was gonna start getting a little more personal. I don’t normally do personal, but at this point in my life I think it could be good for me. I have nothing to lose! So anyway let me just start by saying this… I don’t do fake. I just don’t. I read people very well and trust me when I tell you that I can tell if someone is being fake with me. Ya’ll make it so obvious though. These type of fake people I can deal with because I know how to carry you. And quite frankly, I just don’t care enough about you to put much thought into how you act. You’re a speak and keep it moving type for me!

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[Positive Monday] Live Out Loud

Happy Monday bosses and boss chics! OMG I had an EPIC weekend! I haven’t had this much fun in so long! I wanted to take time out to have a little fun because I really don’t get out as much as I should. Where we live, we go out in Greensboro NC if we really want to have a good time since there’s not really any clubs in my town. On Thursday night, my best friend Tia and I decided we wanted to go out in Greensboro and hit up a few of our girls for the trip.

Friday we spent the evening getting ready at my place, having a good time laughing and joking as we got dressed. And of course we had to have a photo shoot lol, it just wouldn’t be right! We ended up going to a club called Lotus Lounge for one of the local radio personality’s birthday party. We had so much fun! The music was great, the drinks were great and we looked and felt great. I hadn’t had that much fun on a girls’ night out in so long. And the best part about it is between gas, getting in the club, and food and drinks I know I didn’t spend over $25… you know I was winning! lol

The next night, one of my childhood friends had an engagement party as she’s getting married this August and I’m in her wedding. (SN: I’m so excited, I love weddings!) I went to the engagement party with one of my other good friends Brittney and we had so much fun! We got dolled up again and went out expecting it to be a quiet dinner or something and ended up having round two of a night of fun. The dj was great, the food and drinks were so good, and on top of that it was so warming to see the engaged couple basking in their love together. We even hit the Step In The Name Of Love, the Wobble, and the Electric Slide. I can’t express enough how good it makes me feel inside to be surrounded by people in love, or people just out to have a good time with one another in the name of love. It was great!

To wrap up my weekend, I went back down to Greensboro yesterday to my aunt’s church with my family and we went out to dinner. One of the things I love about my family is how we always make sure we get together often so we remain as close as ever. Having a loving family and friends can make such a difference in your life. But most importantly we have to remember to get out and live a little and always enjoy life, because you only have one. Make sure you check out a few pics from my weekend below and have a #PositiveMonday!

XOXO,

LaBellaBoss ♥

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