Oh what a year it has been for me! I swear every year on New Year’s Eve, it feels like I’ve let the whole year pass me by and I’ve accomplished nothing. But this year I couldn’t allow my mind to sell myself short like that. I’ve done a lot. I guess it’s just hard for me to commend myself because I’m still not quite where I want to be. However, a major lesson that I’ve learned this year is that nothing works according to my plan, but according to how God sees fit. My destiny was already written, I’m just living to fulfill it!
I moved into a new house over the summer, graduated in May, and started a new job back in September just for starters. I even joined a new church this year. I feel like this church has helped and continues to help me find my way in life and get closer to God. The whole year has been really productive and a major blessing for me overall, but of course every year has its pits too. I cut some people off completely with no warning, caught up with my middle school best friend and picked up like we never left off, and made a new lifelong friend that I’ve been able to travel with. I went from working part time with no health insurance to a full time salary with a health, dental AND vision plan. I got the opportunity to intern for 102 Jamz, learned the basics of radio behind the scenes, and met some amazing people that I’m sure will be contacts for many years to come.
There’s so much that I didn’t do though. I didn’t get perfect grades my last semester in college, and although I’ve walked the stage I still have three courses left to take before I’m actually done because the ones I needed weren’t offered when I needed them. Before I found my current church, I didn’t go to church for probably the first six months of 2014. I didn’t get to go to my internship as many days as I should have because it snowed so much last winter that there were many days I couldn’t even get out of the driveway. I missed plenty of days of work during the winter because I work in Danville and the weather was bananas. I spent so much money on gas to get to and from work on my 30+ minute drive. I sound ridiculous saying typing this after the first paragraph, but these were all things that I stressed about during the times that they happened.
It’s crazy how our minds work and can allow us to complain about frivolous things that won’t even matter at the end of the year. Life really is a constant evolution. If we get worked up about every little thing that doesn’t go as planned, we’d drive ourselves to have a heart attack. I spent so much time this year stressing about things I couldn’t control. Now that I think about it, I have always had everything I need and that in itself is a blessing. When you’re going through and people tell you “it could always be worse”, we really don’t want to hear that shit. But they’re 100% right, it could.
2014 has taught me a lot about people. I am a giver by nature and I expect that in return from the people I give to. I learned real quick that this is not the case in life at all. People will take from you as much as you’re willing to give and then in return be selfish and give you nothing back. I’ve learned to only do for others when I can genuinely accept that I’ll get nothing in return for that action and it still feels good to do. Ever since I decided I wanted to dabble in makeup and fashion, I get SO many requests from people to make them new looks or do their makeup etc which is very time consuming. People don’t want to pay for good quality products or services anymore, but will spend their last dimes on the most ridiculous things! Your money is your money, but don’t expect my time for free when you wouldn’t give me yours if I paid you.
Lastly I’ve realized the value of knowing who you are. I’ve truly spent the last few years finding myself, figuring out who I am and what I want to represent. Even though I don’t have my own business, I consider myself a brand. I carry myself with high regards and like to uphold my image to a certain extent because I respect myself and I demand respect from others. So I won’t do anything too crazy where my self-respect will be questioned. However, I realize that the current generation doesn’t give two damns about an image. Their only concern is getting likes and retweets and I’m over everything about social media, today’s music artists, and everything majority of these celebrities represent now. I literally follow my 5 fave celebs on Instagram now; it gets more and more ratchet by the day! All I can do is hope that everyone gains some sense of awareness of who they are and what they represent before their souls are swallowed whole trying to keep up with this crazy society we live in right now.
Well that’s enough for my ranting for a whole year. Life can only continue to elevate from now into the future! Keep God first, your circle centered, and pray before you post to Facebook! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!